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Ladue High School's student news site

Ladue Publications

A Totally Unbiased Pizza Review

A+Totally+Unbiased+Pizza+Review

What do you eat when you want a fast, convenient, delicious meal? Pizza, of course. The concept of pizza is so simple, yet ingenious at the same time, layering bread, tomato sauce, and a thick layer of cheese and toppings together. You can’t really go wrong— or can you?

 

Let’s take a dive into various different types of pizza, as I doll out my indisputable opinions on them.

 

Pepperoni – 9/10

It’s a classic, with slices of the beloved spiced salami on top of the layer of cheese. It’s nice and salty with just enough flavor to awaken our dead taste buds. Some say that pepperoni is spicy— I don’t get it though. All-in-all, I’ll admit it is very basic, but it does its job well. No wonder it’s America’s most popular flavor. 

 

Hawaiian – 7/10

To address the ever pressing debate on whether or not pineapple belongs on pizza, I say that it doesn’t, yet, it really doesn’t offend me either. If someone handed me a slice of Hawaiian Pizza, I would definitely eat it, although you can never catch me buying any of my own. The sweetness from the pineapple creates quite an interesting flavor profile, so it gets extra points for keeping things fresh and controversial. 

 

Mushroom – 5/10

Mushroom pizza just lacks flavor, instead mellowing down the taste of the cheese and tomato sauce with the oppressive aftertaste of mushroom. It simply doesn’t excite me, plus I find the texture to be quite weird. Still, it’s pizza, so overall, not the worst. 

 

Veggie – 6/10

Veggie pizza is quite good when you eat it, but also, I would never find myself buying a veggie pizza on purpose. To me, pizza is already an unhealthy food, no use in attempting to add nutrition to it, unless of course you have a dietary restriction. Veggie pizza does get points though for the variety of vegetables you could potentially enjoy on it. From restaurant to restaurant, you’ll probably find a different variation of veggie pizza. The pop of green also makes the slice look very aesthetically pleasing.

 

Mexican – 7/10

Yet another product of westernization, the Mexican, or Taco Pizza is Americans’ attempt at smashing two of their favorite foods together. For the most part, it works. Yes, it sounds odd and unorthodox, but I know many individuals who particularly enjoy it. For me, I don’t find it appalling, but, again, this one doesn’t make my regular order list. 

 

Seafood – 3/10

When I was visiting China a couple years back, I came across a grotesque advertisement showing off shrimp and lobster on pizza. Safe to say, I was scarred for life. To me, seafood simply does not belong. It just seems like a half-hearted attempt to elevate a dish made for late-nights and convenience. Seafood pizza just totally misses the mark.

 

Margherita – 10/10

Margherita Pizza is among my favorites, and reasonably so. The striking visual contrast between the red sauce, white circular cheese melts, and the basil creates quite an appetizing view. Not only that, but I find that Margherita pizza has more depth in flavor than the rest. It’s satisfying to eat, and doesn’t feel quite as heavy as other pizzas. A true culinary experience.

 

BBQ Chicken – 8/10

When I first tried BBQ Chicken Pizza, it pleasantly surprised me. I’m not the biggest fan of BBQ sauce, but I found that the cheese balanced it out quite nicely. Yes, it still is a bit too salty for my taste, but I still enjoy it. To me, BBQ Chicken Pizza is, in a word, weird, but I appreciate how it tries to shake things up.

 

For your reading pleasure and convenience, here are my final rankings:

  1. Margherita Pizza
  2. Pepperoni Pizza
  3. BBQ Chicken Pizza
  4. Hawaiian/Mexican Pizza
  5. Veggie Pizza
  6. Mushroom Pizza
  7. Seafood Pizza
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About the Contributor
Emily Liu, Opinions Editor
Emily Liu is a junior at Ladue, the Opinions Editor for Panorama and Junior Editor in Chief for Melodrama. This is her second year on Panorama. You can typically find her writing, impulse shopping online or making bracelets.

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