Normalize being a Hater.


You may be wondering, “Hey Sydney, spelled with a Y, not an I, why do you want to spread hate so much?” I’m not saying I want to spread hate. If you care to read to the end you will learn, this is not only about the hate in my heart but the way I learn from the hate in my heart. Wholesome. 

And I retort, what once was one woman’s trash is another woman’s treasure. I would love to say that I would happily embrace anyone in my arms as a friend regardless of every factor that goes into them, however I cannot. Hate has a very special place in my heart, it is my treasure. It is another girl’s trash due to the red flags of the boy whose attractiveness stands superior to thoughts of his less desirable factors. What’s important is recognizing those factors and figuring out if it’s worth putting up with and staying around for or worth backing away as urgently as possible.

In a journal for my ~eighth grade experiences~ I kept a sheet in the back that listed many of the actions, things and thoughts that I did not, and for the most part still do not, enjoy. Notice I did not say people. One should not hate certain people, only the actions they force upon the world. I’m not trying to be negative, I’m just trying to look at all sides. This takes me to my first point of interest, well not interest, disinterest: “siding.” Maybe you are unfamiliar with the term I’m using, however you’ve seen it if you live in the suburbs – and even if you live outside of the suburbs, it’s still there, but far worse in the suburbs – and have ever cared to look at the houses around you. It’s everywhere, there’s no escaping it, no running away. Those cheap(compared to brick) slats that have to be painted the same color – beige or white, I don’t know which is worse – over and over so they don’t get too run down. I mean, God forbid a house looks bad in the neighborhood composed of upper class families you preside in marked ‘Private’ – that still is to an extent – in the 30s. It is not only a pain to take care of it but also a pain to look at. Even Editor-in-Chief Sophia Liu, who plans to study urban studies at the University of Pennsylvania, says “ehhhh” to siding.

The house behind mine, erected around 2017, is a fabulous example of the siding issue I cannot stand. The front of the house is composed of brick that is obviously fake, and stone that is even more fake that they have tried so hard to make look real. While they do this disservice to the front, they do an even worse disservice to the right side, left side AND back side. I like to think of it as, “If that house was a human how would they feel? Would they feel exposed, sooty, tired, maybe a mix of everything?” When I look at this house I feel the exposed nature it’s been forced to face with the diservice of the nasty beige siding it’s wrapped in. And the house doesn’t know any different, though I wish I could give it a comforting hug. 

 I’m not saying I entirely hate siding, it depends in what context it’s being used in. When an upper class family wants to come into a neighborhood originally marked private, fitting into the privatizer category, and build a house with siding on multiple sides(typically three) while having enough money to build with brick all around, I see it as a waste of money. In the long run it won’t last as well as brick or stone or whatever your choice of craft is, and it will look insanely ugly. However, it is a different story when a family comes into a neighborhood that is predominantly underclass, not originally marked private, and builds with multiple panels of siding. This may all just be tone deaf to what people can really afford because of how I grew up, in an all brick house, in a neighborhood originally marked private, and fitting in the category of the privatizer. Although I’m jewish, this doesn’t exclude me. And although I didn’t choose to live where/how I live, this still includes me. I’ve been influenced by it constantly and the objects, things and thoughts I hate stem from this and so many others. Handling money in America is so difficult and if I could go into this more I would, but this is supposed to be composed mainly of the things I strongly dislike. 

Next on the list is, you guessed it, holiday cards with sparkles on them. Whether or not you guessed this, I know you know exactly what I mean. Although I love the gesture and the thought, it wasn’t thought through as well as it could be. You have to be truly insane if you think I will keep this piece of cardboard hallmark paper with almost-microscopic pieces of multicolored aluminum and plastic that you bought me. I typically don’t keep holiday cards unless they speak to me, which isn’t a lot because I’ve set the bar high over the years. I certainly do not keep sparkly cards. Additionally, those people who buy them just to only sign their name under those little words that rarely describe how anyone feels suck immensely. You can tell so much about a person based on the type of holiday/birthday card you receive from them. 

One last entity I have written down of characteristics in people I hate is when teenagers, people around my age, say the word “pastime’ in a sentence to sound even the slightest bit smarter. I want people to have a brain and use it, but not in a pretentious teenager using the word ‘pastime’ way.  It doesn’t matter who they say it to, it only matters that they even use it. This is rare, but when encountered I step away as gracefully as possible because it really is the only thing I can do. There are way worse qualities in people, and this is only one example but I cannot pull out more. 

I recommend starting a list of your least favorite qualities in people and anything you hate. It’s proved to be a good resource for me when weighing out the pros and cons of certain people in my life. It’s also a way for me to figure out what it is about someone that I strongly dislike and think, “Do I really think this person is worth putting up with [certain qualities/y]?” Realizing what you hate, or strongly dislike, can build you up and help you realize who you want to spend your time with, and more importantly, who you do not want to spend your time with.